Since our childhood we have been told that every day is a new learning, but we are never told about the challenges that we need to face, the rejections we need to handle, and the phases of self-doubt that we need to manage.
I don't want to bore anyone by talking about med school or college, but wanna share the reality which is nothing like a cute Disney movie.
Being a teenager, or a young adult is not as easy as it is said to be. Personally, these were both beautiful and troublesome years to go through. It was not just the people around me but also myself that I had to fight and figure out what was best for me. Med school plays a major part in everything. There is something new happening every day, and coping with all of that isn't an easy task.
Every single day is a challenge where I need to try and be sane, but can't just go ahead with the flow or the crowd coz it doesn't make sense. I have had people talk crap about me to an extent where it isn't easy to handle and trust me it is not easy to ignore everything. Some situations/stuff leave a mark that we carry lifelong, especially if you aren't part of a crowd or at least pretend to be and follow the rules of society, but no matter what, we are always expected to have a straight face and never burst out coz duh we are future doctors and how are we going to handle the future if a small comment from someone is gonna break us. At this point I just try to push everything deep down coz duh I am not supposed to express myself coz doctors and future doctors need to be able to handle pain both physically and emotionally, but is it really that easy? Nope... Few comments can never be ignored or forgotten, and few glances and reactions stay like a recorded clip in our minds and never go out no matter how much we try. There have been times when I just wanna walk away from conversations, people, groups, and places coz not everything is liked by everyone, but sadly a large part of our society fails to understand that people are different and have different preferences.
After learning to ignore those comments and moving on, new challenges start to show up. Med school doesn't wait for anyone, and it is not a race where the slow and steady win. It's a marathon that needs to be completed without falling or taking a break, but it is impossible to do so. There is like a shit load of things completed each day, and no matter how fast you run or how much of your sanity, sleep, and mental and physical health you give, it is never enough.
24 hours is not a short period, it is more than enough to fuck things up royally, make a fool out of yourself, zone out, burn out, get demotivated, and want a break. There is always a question, why is it always me? Should I just give up and leave? Do I just go somewhere far so that no one can ever meet me again?
Despite all of these, there are a few things that make everything seem worth it, like a call from parents, a call or text from those whom we care about and who care about us, the smile on a patient's face when we talk to them and try to listen to them, the blessings we get from patients and their attenders, and all of a sudden everything starts to seem good.
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